Shawnee Barton
3:7
2011
When I awoke in the recovery room after the implantation, the first thing I saw was a cliché, cutesy Anne Geddes print of a baby in a watermelon. For most, this photo encourages simple, passing thoughts like, “Oh, what a cute baby!”

For me, this photo is a reminder of the one thing I want most in life, the one thing that eludes me. And now, lying in bed at the fertility clinic, it makes me think of all the crazy meds I have put in my body, the friends’ baby showers I have bailed on, and the pain in my heart. In short, the print makes me angry. I think, “Whoever decorated this room should be more sensitive—women battling infertility don’t want to see pictures of babies all around them.” And then I get angry for being angry at a time when I so badly need to be calm.
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